You got an education for THIS.

Perhaps you have sat on the toilet crying and thinking, “I got an education for this?????”

Well, I have realized some important aspects of undergraduate education that have prepared me for the role of parent.  Here they are:

1.        All-Nighters.  You know how you would procrastinate and then finish an entire essay on the night before it was due, or spend the whole night up studying for an exam?  Do you remember the squinchy-eyed feeling you would have when you were trying to get through the next day on coffee fumes?  Who knew that would be exactly how you would feel as a parent of young children?  Perfect training.

2.       Kraft Dinner.  The student diet is the ideal model for the toddler diet.  As an undergrad I learned to cook macaroni and grilled cheese and without these skills my mommy cooking repertoire would be sadly lacking.  I just thought of something.  I should TOTALLY get Emma into Ramen noodles.

3.       Being comfortable wearing track pants 24/7.  Okay, I suppose that in university it was more about  wearing pyjama bottoms and waffly long underwear to lectures.  (What, you didn’t do that, you say?  Well, humour me.)  Now you can get used to rotating through 3 different pairs of lululemon pants that are technically meant for exercise.  Kind of like jogging pants.  I mean, who actually jogs in those bulky things, I ask you!   Anyway, this track pants mentality is probably very familiar to you already, and you can thank your university experience for that.

4.       Cleaning up barf.  Once when I lived in residence the cleaning staff went on strike and it very apparent that there was a lot of puke to clean up.  The binge drinking kind of puke.  Now, as a parent, it is just the kind of puke that your daughter does all over herself in the car. 

5.       “The Frosh 15” I think this was also tenderly named “Rez Butt”.  I have the frosh 15 planted firmly (actually, rather jiggly) around my abdomen at the moment.  Post-partum good times.

I’m sure there are more.  I’ll let you know when I think of them.  This is all I have time for between screams.